Soft and furry little tortoiseshell cat
You know what goes on in my mind,
If you see me heading towards the kitchen,
You’re there before me I find.

“What, boring old cat food” I hear you say,
“I’d rather have chicken or tuna,
And I don’t want to wait till four o’clock,
I’d rather have it sooner.”

Stop looking so innocent and demure.
I found the remains of a bird,
And if you try to blame it on pussy next door
I shan’t believe a word.

No, you can’t have the goldfish in the pond,
They’re not part of your diet,
I’m watching every move you make,
Don’t you even try it.

Sometimes you drive me up the wall,
As crazy as can be,
But, oh, I love you very much
When you’re curled up on my knee.