Ode to Jemima
My cat’s a cousin of Santa
Her name’s Jemima Claws,
She has these lethal talons
Attached to her velvet paws.
My legs are full of little holes,
My trousers torn to shreds,
The chairs have little fringes
And so have all the beds.

I bought her a lovely scratching post,
She turned up her nose at that,
“I much prefer the furniture,
That post’s for a common cat.”
She doesn’t mean to damage things,
She’s doing what all cats do,
She looks at me with melting eyes

And purrs “I do love you.”